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I am a married white male in my late 20's. My wife and I have been married for almost 9 years. I often view interracial porn that is mostly homemade involving real white wives with black men. Over the years this has evolved for me, it initially was just me being turned on by the reality of homemade porn but then it moved on to wives and them cheating with black men and so on. I enjoy watching this because I think it’s dirty and kinky but I never fantasize about it being my wife with other men. I like the thought of the wives being dirty and their husbands being humiliated. I know that my wife knows that I have watched this (most likely from my browser history) because she has made reference in an argument about it in an attempt to piss me off by saying that because I enjoy interracial porn and such that there may be a possibility of me being gay or bi..lol. Anyway, I recently discovered by snooping on her phone that she has been watching interracial porn now almost exclusively. I have not mentioned that I found this at all but I did bring up porn and masturbation the other day during a normal conversation and she told me how she had made herself orgasm twice while watching a man perform oral on a woman. She however, did not mention how it was a black man in the video…I only know this because I watched part of the video while on her phone and it was the same as she described. In the past ( as far as I know) she was never attracted to black men but I think I may have triggered her to watch the porn I was watching therefore implanting the fantasy. To get to the point, I do not want my wife sleeping with other men at all and I think she may have got that impression from what I have been watching. I feel that her new found fantasy may become an obsession and she will lose interest in me and I am reluctant to talk to her about it because If she knows I don’t approve it may become more appealing to her like putting gas on the fire for lack of other words… What should I do?? Just to clarify, the type of porn I am referring to is not just regular interracial porn, It is homemade interracial cheating wife porn. Infidelity is the whole object of the fantasy, that's the reason for my concern for her viewing it.
 

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No, I'm fine with her watching porn...it's the type that she is watching that has me honestly insecure. In these type of pornos that's how the infedely starts, the female is introduced to black men on video and then makes the fantasy a reality...with and/or without the husband being there. I'm afraid she will be consumed by the thought and act on it. And also that she may become less attracted to me.
 

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She watched one video and it has you this worried?? Porn doesn't lead to cheating in women any more than it does in men. Less, I'd wager.

There must be more than this going on for you to be this worried that she would cheat. Or else you have very little confidence in her self control.
 

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So why would it lead to her cheating?? I watch girl on girl sometimes, that doesn't mean I want to experience it for real.
 

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Is the porn somehow dirtier or kinkier or more threatening because it is interracial? If so, there is all kinds of screw up going on there. I get that one might be worried if your wife is having adultery fantasies. I don't get why it is more threatening if she is having INTERRACIAL adultery fantasies. Also, frankly, I am at a loss as to why it's fine for you to use porn to indulge in fantasies about other women but it isn't alright for your wife to use porn the same way.

I am at a loss. Then again, I think that porn is pretty destructive. I just think it bizarre that you think it gets to be destructive for her but not for you.
This is a very specific fetish the OP is into in watching this stuff. The more humiliating the better for them. The more different these guys are from them the better.

Messed up? You bet. Just my opinion.
 

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You look at this specific porn and it turns you on. You say it doesn't mean you want to actually have it happen. It just turns you on.

Why can't it be the exact same for your wife?

It turns her on, but she doesn't want to actually do it.
 

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This one may take the hypocritical prize. You watch this porn frequently and it's OK but it's not OK for your wife to do the same? You worry because she might get the idea infidelity is OK but she's not supposed to have the same concern about her?

Wow.
 

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Basically what he is saying is that he may have given his wife the wrong impression by being into something in fantasy land but he fears she may think he likes it in real life and wants for it to happen.

I see your point in fearing that you may have triggered something in her. My wife just recently shared with me that one of her desires in life is to have a MMF threesome with me and another man. I am NOT into this at all personally. Furthermore she has the hots for this man at work that she wants to do this with. Sounds worse than it is. She desires this only from a sexual standpoint, she desires 2 mens attention on her sexually.

I am not into this fantasy at all and told her maybe one day but not now and we need to work on us. Anyway my point in saying this is, I want to entertain her with the fantasy because I know this turns her on, so I was debating on showing her some of the sites you mention. I have looked at it as well to see if this is something I could do. I decided that I do not want to share her, just my personal preference knowing who I am. I have the same fear as you, if I show her this, will it make her desires stronger?

I personally think it will, so I have decided, at least until I feel more comfortable in the relationship that I am not going to endulge her with this in any shape or form. If she chooses too on her own she can but she really doesnt ever look at porn on her own.

My suggestion to you, talk to her. Ask her what she sees in it, and ask her if she thinks that you want it. Be honest and truthful that this is fantasy and not something you desire in real life. If it is something she wants you will have to decide but let me tell you from EXPERIENCE that you need to follow your heart, if this is something that you can not handle do not be afraid to admit it, it's who you are. While we do anything we can to make the most important people happy in our lives the most important person is you. Be true to yourself.
 

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People usually tell their spouse they 'have a fantasy of a MMF threesome' or whatever other threesome they want, when they already have a certain someone in mind. In other words, when they start thinking of cheating, or already are. They don't want to actually cheat, and in their twisted minds they think they can get their spouse to agree to it then it isn't cheating. They don't REALLY want you involved, they're just involving you to assuage their conscience.

Greenpen, has your wife said this is something she wants to try sometime, like Pravius's wife did?
 

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Discussion Starter #15
Thank you Pravius, I think you have had the best understanding of what I am trying to say. I'm not trying to be hypocritical at all, as I said, I am completely fine with her watching porn, what has bothered me is this specific (wife being used) type of porn that worries me and yes I do fear that I may have triggered something in her, awakened a dragon by actually assisting in creating a fantasy of her committing acts of this nature. I think you're very wise in the way you are handling your situation, if you do show her the sites I think will really make her desires stronger. I think I should just take your advice and come clean about why I've watched it and make it clear that I would never want her to become the girl in the videos and see what she sees in it...as some of these other folks have mentioned, It could really just be nothing..
 

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No, I'm fine with her watching porn...it's the type that she is watching that has me honestly insecure. In these type of pornos that's how the infedely starts, the female is introduced to black men on video and then makes the fantasy a reality...with and/or without the husband being there. I'm afraid she will be consumed by the thought and act on it. And also that she may become less attracted to me.
This sounds like the clowns who advertise for BBC on Craigslist and the delta/gamma husband films his rank 4 wife getting nailed from every direction by black guys and then posts his home videos on a blog. If that's it and that's the only type of porn she's watching you may have created a problem. Quit watching it, quit talking about it, and start acting alpha or you're likely to find a couple of those videos on your wife's phone where she's the star.

Since you're watching this stuff, I'm assuming you'd like to get laid more often that you actually do, is that a fair assumption?
 

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@HOPE 1964- No, my wife has never shared that she would want that. But some things have been odd, like, part of what has pushed me to post this is. After I saw her porn I wanted to feel her out about it. Yesterday morning we made love for the first time in over a week (we had a small argument leading to no sex for a while.) Later in the day I said I was still frisky and suggested we be adventurous and head to the room and watch porn. I insisted she pick the videos and the first thing she brought up was a MMF three-way (white ppl and directed). Later on, she brought up Adult theater porn she said she had seen but grossed her out that involved a married white woman performing oral on many strangers including black men. I told her it was gross and she agreed but she said she just thought it was interesting that she didn’t masturbate to it. At some point she mentioned how so many of the Amateur videos were of wives with black men and asked me why a husband would want to see that- I said I didn’t know.... and she said "well you watch it". I can't figure out if that’s what she wants or if she is trying to see if that is what I want.
 

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@Machiavelli- I consider myself to be an Alpha male and my wife is very attractive, I'm the Department Head at my work, been in 2 wars..blah, blah, blah- I don’t know why but that’s the porn I like...but like I said, I don’t want my wife doing that. And I think we'd all like to get laid a little more often...
 

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@Machiavelli- I consider myself to be an Alpha male and my wife is very attractive, I'm the Department Head at my work, been in 2 wars..blah, blah, blah- I don’t know why but that’s the porn I like...but like I said, I don’t want my wife doing that. And I think we'd all like to get laid a little more often...
Sorry, but none of that is necessarily alpha in the sexual attraction department. How old are you and how often do women hit on you? At work and random, like at the grocery store.
 
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