Bit of a low day, bit of a low week. Have finally stopped the texting/emailing the H who abandoned me. I can't do it anymore. I was really good with the 180 for about three weeks and then I started emailing/texting. I have finally accepted that this is it, he chose to leave me, and I cannot do anything to change that. Writing those emails felt good for about five minutes then the realisation I was still here alone would hit and I'd feel worse than ever. The hurt is worse than ever. I can barely function. I think I thought I could convince him to come back. Tbh, if he ever does one back, alot will have to change. I feel like I'm doing everything to revive ths marriage. I'm in IC, have read loads of marriage books. I'm just so damned tired of it all. Im done.