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  1. Wife had an affair and I now need advice on my course

    General Relationship Discussion
    Hi Everyone, I'm new to the forum but have read a few threads before registering and have already picked up some solid advice but now need some advice please. A bit of background about things first :- I have been with my wife for 15 years and married for 8 years. We have two children, one is...
  2. 2things - 180 and acronyms

    Suggestion Box
    Could there be an obvious link to the 180 article, please? I keep searching for it and can't find it. Found it once, need to refer it to someone else now. Secondly, could there be a list of the many unusual acronyms here? I've been on the net more than 20 years and haven't seen most of these...
  3. What should I have learned from my experience?

    Coping with Infidelity
    It's been a month since I exposed my stbxw's affair. An affair that had gone on with a co-worker for 2.5 years. WW and OP were planning on living a life together the whole time. They were looking for a place together and consulting a lawyer while I was in the dark. I only became aware of the...
  4. Losing steam, trying to get through

    Coping with Infidelity
    Last page summarizes my story for those who don't know it yet http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/190522-help-im-stuck-trying-reconcile-my-marriage-6.html I'm losing steam. I'm about to get the final draft of our separation agreement from the lawyer so we can sign and...
  5. Struggling on my own with post infidelity

    Coping with Infidelity
    Some of you already know my story: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/190522-help-im-stuck-trying-reconcile-my-marriage.html Basically I am moving towards divorce and the separation has already started. Wife had been cheating for 2 years with a co-worker during our...
  6. Help I'm stuck trying to reconcile my marriage

    General Relationship Discussion
    I'll try to summarize the last year of my life: It started last year. My wife says she no longer loves me and reveals an EA (co-worker). Devastated I react like any other man in this situation and try to fix everything and go overboard. I check her emails and phone and as far as I can tell...
  7. Reverse the 180?

    General Relationship Discussion
    Should I initiate contact during the separation? My wife have been together for nine years and married for three of those. We recently separated. The context There is a never ending cycle of blame so it is difficult for me to pinpoint the starting point. In general, for me, it was more about...
  8. The 180 - Lessons Learned - Guidance Appreciated

    Coping with Infidelity
    Long Time Lurker - First Time Poster - I'm looking for guidance and some tough leadership from the veterans. I'd like to share my situation, my early grasp of the 180 (and how I failed just like you vets said could happen), but also the good things that I accomplished. I'm going to crank...
  9. We are trying to be best friends

    Considering Divorce or Separation
    So here is my sad tale. We've been married for 13 years with one child 10 years old. One year ago my wife came to me out of the blue and said she wanted to leave. I was shocked. She couldn't believe that I didn't feel the same way. She thought I didn't love her either. After much promising to...
  10. Wife's EA with Stepbrother...Expose to Family vs. Don't Ask Family for Help per 180

    Coping with Infidelity
    I don't really suppose that my story is outrageously unique, and I'm working on putting my "full story" out there, but I have a specific question which I don't necessarily know requires the whole screenplay yet be completed. My wife has been involved with an on-again/off-again EA with her...
  11. My fiance left!!!

    Going Through Divorce or Separation
    Hi. Much to my anguish my fiance left and is living in another town. The background: I am 33 she is 26. We've been together for 3 years. I know that this doesn't sound like all that long compared to a lot of the other posts I read on here, but it has been an extremely important 3 years of my...
  12. How long does the pain last?

    Physical & Mental Health Issues
    I can't take much more of the pain and rejection. I feel like I'm exploding on the inside. I can't think straight, my work is suffering, my body hurts, I can't eat, and my mind is racing all the time. I can't sleep. The short story is that my wife (37yo, married for 11 years) told me after...
  13. Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

    Coping with Infidelity
    After emailing them, it took 6 hours for the response. Her text to me: "hard to read" and "surreal". She knows I'm serious, and my only response to her was, "I will let the lawyer know it's a go." The court date is 10/31, and seeing the final agreement, while sobering, didn't knock me out...
  14. Doing the 180, but still have things that I want to say to her

    Coping with Infidelity
    I've been doing the 180 for over a month now, and lately I've been thinking of things that I want to say to my STBXW. Some of them I've already said soon after d-day, but want to make sure she understood what I was trying to express, others have occurred to me since I started the 180. The 180...
  15. The situation after 5 months being separated

    Coping with Infidelity
    My wife has now been living with her AP for a month. Court date is 10/31 and I've been doing the 180. She shows absolutely no signs of wanting to return, in fact talks about our daughter going to school in her district next year. I thought the impending divorce might cause her to consider R. I...
  16. Feeling quite vengeful toward WW

    Coping with Infidelity
    Maybe vengeful isn't the right word. I'm feeling a lot of anger today. She left my daughter and I and moved in with AP and I know they spend Sundays together, never calls to have her daughter on Sundays. It's actually great for me having her all day, it's just this lack of caring on her part...
  17. Yes she's with someone else! We have a kid. Can i get her back?!

    Coping with Infidelity
    hey, guess i'll lay it out real quick and simple. my wife and i have been together for about 3 and half years. married for about 11 months. we've had plenty of up and downs. we've "seperated" in the past for short periods of time (before our marriage) but after we finally got married...
  18. Not sure if its saveable

    Considering Divorce or Separation
    Hi my wife and I have been married for 2.5 yrs and she recently asked me to leave she said she was finished and wanted a divorce. The next day after we had calmed down I spoke with her on the phone and we decided to take a few days to see where things landed. Its been almost a week and we...
  19. Communication during the 180

    Going Through Divorce or Separation
    My wife and I are separated and actual divorce proceedings are pending. We share the kids 50/50 and I am doing my 180. Our communication is good and friendly/cordial but only about kids and the logistics of setting up our two homes, we have not spoken about the relationship for a few months...
  20. Question about 180 - OK to say "I miss you?"

    Reconciliation
    :scratchhead:Hi All - I am seeing my husband (for dinner) tonight for the first time since he moved out a week ago to take a "time out"/separation. I am doing my best to work the 180 program, and I get that it is not advised to say ILY, but no where on the list does it give direction on whether...
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